Bye bye baby

Jinlin in her new coat on Sunday

I returned to Finland on Monday and have been since then quite busy with work, dinners with friends and associations, meeting my boys and "enjoying" some jet-lag. Another party of 20 guests coming up here at my place tomorrow evening and then for the weekend to board-gaming event with my boys. Good to be busy now to avoid excessive feelings of emptiness and to match Jinlins busy study schedule. She told her school pressure is getting even worse now when the final month of the term ending at Chinese new year approaches. I can believe that since it's 2 AM in China at the moment and she was still doing some schoolwork :-(

It was a good visit. Very peculiar combination of love, work and sightseeing, but good. In the end she was able to spend time with me on five of my nine days in Shanghai, less than I had originally hoped when I bought the tickets but more than she had promised just before the trip. Mostly my moods were very good and I think hers were as well. There were few low points such as Tuesday evening when she had to return to her school and I knew there will be two whole days without seeing her again until Friday. And then of course the inevitable separation after our last hours together on Sunday. "Bye Bye Bù  Hǎo" (bye-bye not good) like we were talking before. But that's ok, that's how it's supposed to be. Like the Finnish Neon 2 love song "Kemiaa" tells: "Sen täytyy joskus satuttaa... Ei siitä muuten mitään tuliskaan" (It has to sometimes hurt... It would not otherwise work).

Bought her roses and lilies for farewell gift

This trip was setting a good precedent for a series of hopefully more frequent visits. The flights, hotel and visa cost only 800 euros and food is cheap so I can afford to travel there several times per year. Furthermore this visit did not consume almost any of my holiday days since I was able to work few hours every day when Jinlin was at her school. So we agreed I will go next time already at Chinese new year, in February 10 next year, when her first term has ended and she has some real holiday we can spend in Henan. That's only two months to wait compared to the five months between the last two visits.

Going for it

Most importantly, there was renewed commitment to the relationship. That will be needed, since her current degree studies will take still at least 1.5 years more and there is no much hope for getting to live together before that. I was telling in a chat yesterday about my occasional worries that time and distance would become a problem or she would find someone else in China. I greatly respect her courage:

Jinlin:   我 不 怕 时间 或者 距离 . 你 担心 ？
Wǒ  Bù  Pà  Shí jiān  Huò zhě  Jù lí  .  Nǐ  Dān xīn  ？
( I am not afraid of time or distance. Do you worry? ) 

Robert:  对 我 一点 担心 . 但是 我 开心 你 不 怕
Duì  Wǒ  Yī diǎn  Dān xīn  .  Dàn shì  Wǒ  Kāi xīn  Nǐ  Bù  Pà
( Yes, I worry a little. Although I am happy you are not afraid ) 

Jinlin:  是的 ， 我 理解 你的 心情
Shì de，  Wǒ  Lǐ jiě  Nǐ de  Xīn qíng
( Yes, I understand your feeling )

Robert: 我 尝试 很 忍耐
Wǒ  Cháng shì  Hěn  Rěn nài
( I try to be very patient )

Regarding my other worry, she was equally determined:

Robert:  但 有时 我 担心 你 找 别 人 在 中国 。
Dàn  Yǒu shí  Wǒ  Dān xīn  Nǐ  Zhǎo  Bié  Rén  Zài  Zhōng guó  。
( But sometimes I worry you find someone else in China ) 

Jinlin: 我 心理 有人， 放不下 别人， 所以 你 懂 ？
Wǒ  Xīn lǐ  Yǒu rén，Fàng bù xià  Bié rén，Suǒ yǐ  Nǐ  Dǒng  ？
( When my heart is on someone, there is no space for anyone else, do you understand? ) 

 Robert: 是的 . 谢谢
Shì de  .  Xiè xiè  :-)
( Yes, thank you! )

 What a great lady she is! Makes me proud of her and willing to strive for same level of resolution :-)

I've posted links to some pictures on the trip already earlier, but here's the full collection: Arrival, Sunday in Jiading, Qiuxia garden, Karaoke, Shanghai downtown, Shanghai Bund, Jade Buddha Temple, Buying clothes.